“You’ll never be able to conquer what you’re not willing to face.” Ever since my pastor spoke those words a couple weeks ago, they have been on my mind. Not because I hadn’t heard them before, but because I started this year off with that statement as my motto.
At the end of last year, I was struggling with fear in many areas. I prayed and fasted without ceasing…still, no breakthrough. Fast forward to the beginning of this year, God asked me to lead a small group. My immediate reaction was to ignore him. Surely, I hadn’t heard him right. But then, his voice came again. That second time, I knew God meant business because he wouldn’t leave me alone…I had no peace. I asked God why he wanted me to lead a group. I got no immediate answer. One day, as the leader deadline was approaching, God said, “How can I give you victory over something that you won’t face? God had gotten me right together lol. So, although reluctant, I was obedient.
The first day of my small group, I was nervous. The enemy found an opening. I began to think about all the areas that I was lacking. “You’ve never led anything…no one will like your class…you don’t speak well in front of people…you don’t know how to pray…you’ve only been a “real” Christian for less than a year.” These are the thoughts that invaded my mind. I pushed the thoughts back and reminded myself of God’s word. You know what happened next, God got me through an awesome first class!
As the weeks passed, God led me through each class. He gave me the desire to learn the material and the right people to discuss it with. One day, one of the class members came to me with an awesome testimony about being in the class and I was in awe. God had used me to work in someone else’s life. Then God dropped some wisdom on me…I realized there was a reason that I feared so much. The enemy knew that if I could get over my fears, I could impact lives. He tried his hardest to dissuade me, but it didn’t work. So, hear me when I tell you this… YOU ARE THE REAL THREAT. I’m not saying those feelings of doubt and fear won’t come up. They probably will every now and then. You just have to remind yourself that God’s got your back! The enemy already knows that the fight is fixed, he’s just hoping that you’ll forget.
Now that I am finished with the class, I look back in amazement. With God, I was able to face something that seemed terrifying to me. It was nothing like I thought. Within those 13 weeks, I learned and grew a lot. Now, when God presents me with an opportunity for growth, I take it. As apostle Paul says, work out your salvation in fear and trembling. I choose to obey God because I know he is working in me. I’m not perfect, but his grace is sufficient. You’ll never know what’s on the other side of the sea if you don’t cross it. So, If there is something in your life that you know God is calling you to do, don’t let anything stop you! God says, “If I am for you, who can be against you.” So, look in the mirror and repeat after me, “I win!”